Offenses...

By Scott A. Phillips

If there is one thing that is a thief of joy and a drain of purpose in the lives of otherwise good people, it is this singular issue. Jesus said it this way, "it must needs be that offences come..." Or let me translate it, "Get ready to get offended." People are going to hurt your feelings, take you for granted, say mean things and even cast you in a bad light.

This is going to come from all directions. From people you have never met, people you barely know, your neighbor, your children, your spouse, your best friend. Everyone will hurt you at some point. I would like to tell you different, but the truth is embodied in yourself. You have a bad day some times, right? Wake up on the wrong side of the bed and fail to be as understanding as you should be, right? Well, on one of those bad days you probably hurt someone's feelings. You did not mean to, but because you were wrapped up so tight in your own thoughts you failed to consider others. Of course, if you were confronted you would have all sorts of excuses and could easily justify your lack of consideration.

Headline: Everyone has bad days and the day they offended you, it was their turn. So, just as you expect and hope others will cut you some slack, you must cut them some slack as well.

In my short life, (forty-two glorious years,) one of the greatest thieves in the lives of people I love and care for is this little fox called offense. Offense is a funny thing. It does not have to be a big thing, it can and often is a little thing. However, that source of sensitivity is easily infected - and from that place of offense all sorts of trouble will flow, surging into a flood of consequences.

I had an ingrown toenail once. It was intensely painful. It seemed everyone would bump or step on my foot. I was very aware of every little transgression of others' feet, because of my pain. Offense is like that. Do yourself a favor and everyone that loves you - just let it go. If you choose to keep it, nurse it, care for it and protect it; you are holding on to a bitter evil that will ruin the good God has planned for you."For if ye forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you:" (Matthew 6:14)

Forgiving and releasing others from what they did to hurt your feelings is really not about them. It's about you. Even if they continue to be a jerk or jerk-ette, just let it go. If you let jerks and jerk-ettes contaminate your spirit, they get to live there rent free and you carry the weight and live with the stench of what they've dumped on you. The sad thing is, when you're living in offense, you end up hurting the ones you love and projecting that hurt on others. You begin to be hurt and offended at others who don't realize you have a large infection.

When you are nursing a hurt... nip it in the bud. Don't let it continue. Take a deep breath, pray a prayer for grace from God for yourself and then give it to the person who just ticked you off for their selfish ways. Your Father and Stepfather, your Mother and Stepmother, your Brother and Stepbrother, your Son and Stepson, your in-laws and out-laws; forgive them. Bless them. Cut them some slack.Bless 'em again. Do it till you mean it.

If you do not, you will continue to plow in the barren field of bitterness and harvest rotten onions of trouble. If you will forgive, in doing so, you will be able to progress to the next stage in God's purpose for your life. Forgive the offense; large and small, recent and long ago.

Editor's Note: Pastor of New Birth Church in Clinton, Mississippi, Scott Phillips is married to Becky. They have three fine sons who are growing in God. Scott is a . prolific writer with his own blogsite, several books, and numerous articles to his credit.                                                                                                               - mjk