Don't Mention It!

By Jill Friedman

When someone does something for you out of their heart and you say, "thanks," they often say, "Don't mention it." They did it with love and it didn't hurt them at all because they cared or had it to spare.

There are other times when a person can bring up a matter over and over and nag because of their own dissatisfaction. You wish they would stop "mentioning it." It's kind of the reverse of the above. They expected you to meet their need and because you didn't they keep reminding you over and over in the hopes that you will yet do it, or because they can't get it off their mind.

My mother like this motto, "If more husbands were self-starters, their wives wouldn't have to be a crank." It's also true that some never stop focusing on others' imperfections but can't or won't fix their own.

Some time back my brother told me that God was really dealing with him about studying to be quiet. He is now a really good listener - to the point that you sometimes feel you're having a one-sided conversation. So many things are better left unspoken. Like the carpenter's motto, "Measure twice and saw once." - the same can be said for speaking.

The Bible says when you do good deeds, do them in secret and your Father will reward you openly. The Bible also says don't let your right hand know what your left hand is doing when it comes to good deeds. If we can just go on each day for Jesus - doing our own work to the best of our ability - we will be happier than if we try to stand on yesterday's laurels or moan over its errors.

We can't keep the Old Testament tit for tat, eye for an eye philosophy. Jesus said, If they want your coat, give them your coat also. Somehow we've got to come to the point where we don't fear personal loss. If we accept this society's rigorous agenda and suck in more and more for ourselves, we will never be satisfied.

Twice now, my husband and I have lost nearly everything; once in a partnership breakup, and once in a fire. We have also had our daughter spared after being hit by a van while she was walking to school. At first, it is shocking. Then these near total losses make you realize what is really important and what you really can live without. In spite of all the house stuff we lost, (which was almost everything,) life goes on. But when faced with possibly losing our daughter, the pressure was almost unbearable.

I guess what I'm trying to say is - don't hold on dearly to things that don't count. Letting go of fear and self-seeking goals can give more freedom. Not holding bitterness or resentment; forgetting the bad things that others have done, and that have happened to you will set you free. The Bible says all things work to the good for those that love God and are the called according to His purpose.

Don't speak too much or too soon. Listen. hear. Don't repeat bad news; not over and over in your mind - or - to others. Let it go. Don't mention it. If you think you've done good, let that go too. Keep on doing good and don't dwell on your goodness. Remember, only God is good. Let your love be real, not seeking a reward. Don't mention it!

Editor's Note: Sis. Jill has been a member of New Life Apostolic Church since the mid-1970's. After 34 years of marriage and continued faithfulness to God, she saw her Jewish husband repenting, being baptized in Jesus' Name,and filled with the Holy Ghost, just like the Bible says! She continues faithful, playing her saxophone, teaching little children, singing in the choirs, and blessing us all every so often with the song, "You Must Be Born Again."